Ethics and Religion for adults
There are concepts that benefit us tremendously for a limited time. Knowing when its time to play is great for a second grader to learn. When daddy is doing his bills or working from home its not time for pretending to be a ghost or making slime. (My daughter will argue its always time for that!) But, no- we learn simplistic concepts of what is appropriate or inappropriate and what is right or wrong as a child.
What keeps order is when people in certain settings are aware that their actions will result in punishment. The armed guard in courtrooms and bank lobbies keep these locations safe. Sadly, this is true at keeping violence’s down at many schools. People do what they are supposed to do because threats of punishment stop them. In school students cannot control themselves for MANY years. They must be caused to do what is right. This occurs when punishment is present. Punishment and consequence allows us to learn that doing the wrong thing gets us punished.
In the reverse we learn that doing good things gets us presents. Santa Clause brings us toys when we behave well. Our parents tell us to be good to get a prize. The dentist, the doctor, the grandparent all in good intentions promise us to get through whatever boring , scary, or painful problem for a treat. We learn that doing good should get us a gift.
But as mature people this does not always work out.
Sometimes bad people do not get punished. Your hair will turn grey as you wait for ill behaved people to be punished. A person who you view is evil may get away with breaking the law over an over again. As a child I saw many drug dealers and prostitutes who worked for decades in plain site. People with bad attitudes at work where promoted and moved on to management. They never faced penalties for their crimes.
Conversely people who do what’s right don’t always get a shiny prize. People obey the rules sometimes don’t get anything. We pay taxes, pay our bills, eat vegan and still have evil come our way. We all have known someone who seemed almost an angel who died at an age we feel like is to soon. “They didn’t deserve this,” we say bitterly.
Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what is the good, pleasing, and perfect will of God.
Romans 12:2
This black and white thinking often makes us look silly like this adult making childish faces. Many who struggle with addiction have an overwheelming feeling of entitlement. The world owes them something. Often its just a feeling because of what they see as an amazing accomplishment. “I have done all of this. I deserver to…” is uttered before another bad choice.
We think as little 7 year old’s. Full of disdain we stand up and remind adults about the rules of the game we where taught. A game we are too big to play. I loved her so long, she is supposed to love me back. I did everything they asked, she is supposed to promote me. I took care of him all these years. Why are they not taking care of me? After all I’ve done I shouldn’t have to ask. I shouldn’t have to explain. My family, my world, my job, my loved one owes me. We feel as though we deserve the candy. We deserve what ever prize is out there with our name on it.
If you have an attitude of deserving something in the adult world you could earn a label. If you feel you deserve something because of your race you are entitled. If you feel you have earned something because of you hard work and you reach for it you are aggressive. If you are within the reach and have power to have what you feel you deserve you are assertive. Depending on where you are in life you can almost keep the expectation if your lucky. Maybe without all of the tantrums.
When you bring this childish mentality to God it causes problems.
- You don’t deserve the prize
- You can’t control the process
Before you come to God with the I deserve something attitude lets look at some truths
| Quote: | Verse |
| For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God | Romans 3:23 |
| Do not enter into judgment with Your servant, For in Your sight no one living is righteous. | Psalms 143:2 |
| If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. | 1 John 1:8 |
I say this to quell fits not to destroy self esteem. When you try to bring this concept of black and white and regulations to God as though you are angry with him you don’t have a lot of wiggle room. God brings all our actions and thoughts into consideration. Sometimes as I look at the word and see so many things I need to work on. IT makes me humble. DO I have things in God I am entitled to yes. DO I have things I have to be aggressive for yes. Does god make me assertive because he tells me I am worthy yes. Can I demand something from God that I feel he owes me? God is sovereign. HE make rules for us and when he sees fit he does what he wants.
With king David the rule was you couldn’t eat the show bread it was the lord’s () David ate the show bread because God allowed him to. The rule keepers would have been like well God kill David then. But its GOd’s game. God’s system. He can do what he wants and we are at his mercy.
On the reverse side we have to be careful of the attitude that demands we get what we deserve. Guilt and shame can tie us to wrong doings in a very negative way. We can have a mentality of the expectation of punishment. People will begin to stop trying for life and start waiting for death. Guilt is very powerful. Adam and Eve famously hid from God after they sin. Judas ran from Jesus after he betrayed him. This is about control. I hilariously remember both seeing this and being this. My kids will put themselves in timeout or try and punish themselves. This way we use the punishment to try and erase the guilt from our minds.
God is about balance. The next verse explains it best.
Romans 8:7 For scarcely for a righteous man will one die: yet peradventure for a good man some would even dare to die.
8 But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.
9 Much more then, being now justified by his blood, we shall be saved from wrath through him.
When we where wrong. God Justified us by the sacrifice of Jesus. SO now we are righteous or good ONLY because he says we are good. And because he cause us GOOD we cannot be die in guilt and shame BAD. The blood transcends the rules God made himself. You cannot be good enough to get a gift. Your gift receiving is now based on the lords wisdom. You cannot be bad enough to receive evil. IF anything comes upon you its actually working for your good.
Making Room Ministry 